Manshika our newbie reporter has managed to bug the GoM meet, chaired by Sonia and hanging on by plugged-in mobile phone, the rising star in INC's firmament, Rahul Gandhi. Here are the excerpts from the ongoing meet:
Manmohan: Is everybody in? Turns and looks at Sonia, who is whispering into her mouthpiece, Shall I proceed? Sonia listens to her earpiece, nods and smiles at everyone and at the wall where the new designs are floating for adoption. Manmohan clears his throat, Pranabji, please proceed.
Pranabji nods and beams at Sonia, bows with a folded Namaste and says, "After careful consideration, my Ministry has decided that we will have a symbol that reflects the unique persona of the ordinary Indian, the aam aadmi. The aam aadmi wakes up everyday, swatting flies from the neighbor's dung and to the cry of his new-born wailing for milk that never comes from the droopy breast of his mom, who is washing the bums of their third born. The aam aadmi then proceeds to wash his face from the bucket in which last night's sumptuous dinner of lentils and 2 rotis have been collect-puked by his family of six into day before's forgotten lunch, all of which is floating in the rain-water that was collected by placing it strategically to catch the 5 drips from the roof. He doesn't stir, but shakes the mixture and through a narrow gap wets two-fingers and begins brushing his teeth."
Sonia interrupts Pranab and says, "We should provide everyone with a neem twig-like stick that has multiple uses in the next elections. My Uncle Q has a factory in Sicily which can produce everything and anything. Your description of the aam aadmi has been approved by Rahul."
Pranab beamed his teeth at everyone. Alagiri, the Chemicals Minister and P.Chidambaram, the Home Minister, the former who was responsible for security inks and dyes and the latter who was responsible for overall security of the notes consignment looked at each other and raised their hands in unison and also said in unison, "The aam aadmi in Tamil Nadu is different. He is slightly ahead of his brothers elsewhere, receives money for casting his vote and generally doesn't give a shit about what his currency of the day is, but yes, if the symbol has any minutest resemblance to the devnagiri script he will burn buses and stop trains. Be warned."
Sonia began to look worried and started whispering into the phone urgently, while Manmohan continued uninterrupted in his nap. A.K.Antony looked at the ceiling.
Pranab scratched his nose and replied, "C'mon saar, how can you speak like this? How can the Tamlians not integrate themselves into the fabric of the federal comity of States? Where do you think the money for all this is going to come from? Did I not describe the aam aadmi so well, even Soniaji approved?" He gave a glance at Sonia who was at that very moment pointing her mouth-piece at Alagiri and Chidambaram both of whom were on their feet and gesticulating wildly at Pranab and mouthing the words "Hindi down, down!"
Sonia got up and waved at everyone and walked out from the GoM meet prompting Manmohan to wake up, nod, and go back to napping again. Antony took this moment of confusion to place on record the words, "This meeting has been suspended and will be re-animated at the request of Sonia. Whatever decision she takes in consonance with Rahul, whose name also has the word R will be final and binding."
The NSG guard wakes up Manmohan who looks around and beams and nods at their retreating backs and follows them out. Our camera which is sound n motion sensored, switches itself off after 2 minutes.
As we go to online-publish status, we have reliably learned that all the 5 short-listed designs for the symbol have been thrown out and the news is that the new symbol will have R morphed with the caricature of Gandhi. We are waiting breathlessly.
***FLASH***
