by Maverick58
Post the euphoria of the Budget Presentation during which an irresponsible opposition succumbing to the doe-eyed charms of its leader staged a walk-out creating world history by shirking its collective responsibility as a democratic brake-tool to the government of the day’s runaway, unopposed proposals, Manmohan got down from his cavalcade at the portico of his official residence with a beatific smile. The conversation that followed has been culled from the various mikes of the NSG, SSG and other assorted agencies that have their agents in place, chiefly to listen-in to the talk that occasionally occurs between a man and his wife. We reproduce excerpts, thanks to the enterprise of Mohini Kunwari’s twin, Ashwin Kunwar Jhootkar
“Oye, Gulsharan, I am home. Where are you? I am hungry, you hear”
Kaur peeps out from the cavernous kitchen situated deep in the bowels of the official ‘hovel’ and says, “ I am making you chapattis, ji”
Removing the paraphernalia that has become the sartorial requirement of modern day Heads of State with a grimace, “ And what goes with it?”
“ Gur, half an onion and some salt and if I can manage it, one green chilly”
“ My AIIMS doctors say I am healthy, why are you putting me on a diet, ji?”
“ With the pittance that you give me, this is all I can come-up with, ji”
“Ha, I am the Prime Minister of India, and I can feast on anything I want. Where are the rajma and the saag that I have not had for days now?
“ Why ration shop? He can go to the canteen at the Parliament Annex. Hmpf, I must ask Chddu bhai to look into the affairs of my home, first.”
“Arrey, that canteen is run by a BJP man who diverts all the high-quality stuff to his niece’s kirana store at Hoshiarpur which is going to be Advani’s next constituency, since his party has asked him not to represent Lahore anymore, ji”
“ I must ask Rahul to visit the canteen and party there with his friends and not pay the bill and also remind Chiddu bhai to allow the presswaalas and that Gurumurthy chap and of course Brinda too and as for Lahore, that reminds me, I have to talk to Nirupama”
“Oh! Nirupama! Ha! For the past 2 months it has always been Nirupama this and Nirupama that till late in the night. Tell me something, has she become my sauten? I wouldn’t be surprised, ji”
Gruffly with a sideways look, “ Nirupama is not that attractive and besides she has halitosis, sonyo”
Wiping her hands on the duppatta and going all misty-eyed, Gursharan says, “ Sonyo? do you know it has been exactly 64 days since you called me that. Can I sit on your lap for a moment, ji or will Pranab tax this too?”
“Sonyo, do you know why I talk to you? It’s because you give me ideas. Just imagine, if there was a 1-rupee tax, which will be levied every time a registered couple get within one foot of each other there will be no budget deficits in India” Pecking her cheek, “ Thank you, sonyo. I must ask Nandan to put that sub-routine into the UID chip too with auto-debit”
“What? The one pleasurable activity left for the aam-aadmi and you want to tax that, too? Did they teach you that in Oxford?” And 
Recovering from the stinging slap Manmohan blushed and said, “ No, not Oxford, but Hilary when she met me for a one-on-one on her last trip. She has good nether lips, you know?” Sighs, “ At our age that is all we can do.”
A tinny voice with a nasal Texas twang erupts from the lamp, “ We got you, Manmohan” as the NSG commandos come rushing in and put Gulsharan on a choke-hold. It was later established that a mole from RAW had also placed Dick’s private army mike for the listening pleasure of ‘Jhaatu”Bush who often refers to his wife as, “ That f**king c**t”.
You read the taxable ideas here first.
